Nicholls’ parking situation means that students should expect to arrive on campus 20 minutes prior to the beginning of their classes, which also means they will have time to sit in the halls waiting for the previous class occupying the room to end.I won’t lie; I love sitting in the halls before class and observing students walking to and from class. It gives me a lot of time to judge and critique their wardrobes. From the overdressed to the students who look as though they just woke up, Nicholls has something to offer that would interest any “people-watcher.”

My favorite type of student is the one who tries too hard to impress his or her peers. I’ve categorized this breed of student by gender: the girl who wears six-inch heels, four pounds of make-up and struts through the halls as if she owns it; and the guy who looks as if his muscles will tear the shirt off his chest while his shaved, spray-tanned legs blind all who dare to gaze upon their glorious splendor.

This phenomenon can be summed up into one-word, ridiculous. When searching for these two anomalies of nature, listen for the clickety-clack of Ms. Ankle Agony Clown Face’s six-inch heels or look for the glossy sheen from Mr. Orange-Legged Shirt Hulker’s freshly sprayed legs.

We get the point. You want to look good. I think I speak for everyone when I say that there is nothing attractive about trying too hard. Remember, you are going to class, not attending a formal dinner meeting with the President of the United States of America or applying for the Miss Universe Beauty Pageant.

Mr. Orange-Legged Shirt Hulker’s problem lies not with overdressing but with his shorts and Baby Gap T-shirt. Wearing gym shorts or cut-off jogging pants that go higher than two inches above the knee is unacceptable.

I, for one, do not want to see your legs, even though they resemble two glazed turkeys that just came out the oven on Thanksgiving Day. Although I know you would like to show off your muscle-bound legs and chest, the classroom is not the place to do it.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, we have the dirty, greasy, smelly students who look as though they just woke up from a 53-hour nap. Take a bath for Pete’s sake. I don’t claim to be a fashion genius or anything, but I do shower every day and expect students around me to do the same thing out of courtesy.

Hair that is greasy enough to keep Pennzoil or Crisco in business is not acceptable in any walk of life, especially in a college situation. If you think people are laughing at your Scruff McGruff pajamas, it’s because they are. Wake up two minutes earlier and put on some jeans for everyone’s well being.

Again, I don’t claim to be a fashion guru, but I do feel that everyone should take two minutes out of his or her morning to put on some grown-up clothes and refrain from allowing a perfectly round stomach to creep out of the bottom of a two-size-too-small wife-beater.