Dealing with RBF is exhausting

March 27, 2019

Graphic by Jessica Mouton

Graphic by Jessica Mouton

Body language can be described as many things. It is this simple, everyday, nonverbal communication tool that can be universal and beneficial but can also be easily misunderstood.

The problem with body language is that it’s a constant thing. Having to always remember to control the infamous resting angry face, or what everyone calls RBF, is a struggle.

RBF is unintentional, and I’m tired of hearing about it.

My problem, and I know I am not alone on this, is that I forgot people are always watching. I forget that my face just so happens to show every emotion I have ever experienced and sometimes it shows none at all.

People, insecure by nature, are always watching, wondering, trying to figure out what other people are thinking or how other people perceive them.

Stop it. No, I do not have a problem. No, I’m not mad at you. And yes, I was in a good mood until you assumed I wasn’t.

For the most part, I’m a cheerful person. I’m just trying to get through the day and stay positive just like everyone else. What bothers me is when people say I looked mean before getting to know me.

I promise I’m not, and before I knew of this problem I had, I would worry about how I was presenting myself. Now, my typical reaction to “I thought you were mean at first,” is “Sorry. That’s just my face,” as I laugh it off.

Don’t get me wrong, I have bad days, too. Emotions are hard to hide no matter what they are, and for a face that tells everything, there is really no getting around it.

When something is actually bothering me, I feel I have the abilities to make it known, confront it and deal with it. Other than that, I’m sorry. It’s just my face, and as soon as I hear a “hello” or see a wave, I reply with just that.

Overall, I’m working on my RBF, but if everyone could go about their day making fewer assumptions, that’d be great. Thanks.

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