Nicholls State University has put into effect a new housing system. It is a point system that takes into account a student’s classification, grade point average and quality of friends. One is given a numerical value by adding his or her accumulation of points, which I will refer to as your “Nicholls worth.” At the end of every semester, each student’s Nicholls worth is evaluated and plugged into a ranking system. The students are then mercilessly redistributed amongst campus residence halls and apartments for the next semester. Student preference is absolutely taken into consideration, but only as far as his or her Nicholls worth is concerned.

First and foremost I must clarify that this new system is not the most unnecessarily complicated idea I have ever heard of. It’s the second on the list.

In kindergarten, my next cubby neighbor suggested that we would be better able to pick up chicks if we convinced them we were bad asses. For three weeks, we tatted up our biceps with licorice-scented markers and smoked discarded cigarettes under the bleachers.

I even dressed up as Dr. Dre for our Halloween party. Inconceivably, none of this merited us any more play. Come to find out, all we had to do to pull the ladies in was quit picking our noses and sharing our boogers.

I can only surmise two possible reasons Nicholls would change from the current housing system. Either the students preferred the new system or Nicholls figured the new system would be easier to manage. I guarantee it’s not the former of the two.

Now I didn’t take any polls, but then again, neither did Nicholls. Nicholls did not ask for the students’ preferences. Based on whom the new system considers worthwhile, you would think they would have at least asked the intellectual seniors with smart friends.

Perhaps Nicholls believed this point system would be an easier student distribution method. The word is that Nicholls completely messed up distributing residents this semester. Could this new point system possibly be easier than the current “sippy cup” equivalent of first come, first serve? No shot.

Before setting fire to any administrative buildings, take into consideration how the new system affects you. Seniors, show up on room selection day with a buddy or three, and you will get your spot in La Maison. Juniors, honestly, you will get your La Maison room as well.

Sophomores, I’m pretty sure you are the only ones that possibly get the shaft. Unless you have upper classman buddies, you may not get a room in La Maison. Freshmen are all going to be shuffled into Hall C, and they will live happily together for one year. Personally, I think that is adorable. Freshmen bonding time is critical for student maturation.

Some people might say I’m biased. If you are living on campus, you had a meeting where you were supplied with information and a green (not eco-friendly) sheet explaining the new system. Develop your own opinion. Everyone else, just take my word for it.